Complex Trauma Recovery; We Are Traumatized MotherfuckersMental Health

Complex Trauma Recovery; We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers

CPTSD Recovery: We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers

3.9a NonViolent (Effective) Communication

Fri, 15 Sep 2023

Ever feel "unheard"?

Well, here's the key to getting your point across and sparking collaboration rather than opposition.

Today, we're talking about NonViolent Communication (NVC) - the 4 step framework for communicating effectively about emotions and unmet needs without stimulating defensive reactions or leaning on your own deeply ingrained control tactics... And so much more.

Wanna transcript and some doods to listen along with? Find it here!

Looking to do more than scratch the surface on NonViolent Communication? Check out the new NVC "Collection" as it populates on Patreon! We're wrapping about all the NLP details and recovery implications with whiteboard vids and workbooks, to boot, at

ps - your patronage makes this entire project possible. Thank you, Fuckers.




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3.8b. Shitpologies (AKA non-apology apologies)

Fri, 01 Sep 2023

So, how do we apologize "the right way"... Rather than creating MORE damage through half-assed "I'm sorrys"?

Today, let's talk about the 5 points for offering a real apology for sake of true relational healing... And four examples of how NOT to apologize, unless you actually want to make the emotional abandonment experience worse for your partner.

Looking for 10 more examples of terrible non-apologies? Hit up the recent episode "Non-Apology Apologies" over at And fuckle up for NonViolent Communication month, coming at ya in September.

For the transcript version of this (and every) episode, go to And do some extra CPTSD learnin while you're there.

Cheers, Fuckers!



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3.8a. The Key to Healing Relational Ruptures (and two people)

Wed, 16 Aug 2023

How DO we heal what's been broken? I've got a short phrase for you - it's what we've all needed to hear all along.

And let's talk about the timeless wounds patched up by real apologies, as we prepare to talk about shitty apologies next time.

Hail yerSelf and Cheers Fuckers.

Git the transcript version of this post at and check out some doods while you're there.

Catch up on the recent downpour of episodes over at and help this one-human DIY project keep spreading the good news about healing.


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Extra "survival Fs" to give in relationship; Fronting and Feigning

Thu, 27 Jul 2023

We all know about the 4 survival Fs at this point. But how about the additional F reactions- Fronting and Feigning?

Let's talk about learned reactions that keep us feeling safe in relationship... while rotting out the connection, engaging manipulation tactics, and using fear as a self-defense.

Looking for more "real relationship talk"? Well that's the order of the month, over in the private podcast stream. We're dropping four full episodes of "less fluffy" relational conversations, talking about how relationally traumatized partnerships actually tend to shake out... and how to "read them" before you're in too deep.

See you there!

And cheers, Fuckers!



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3.7. Determining "Are they a good relational partner?" before committing

Sat, 15 Jul 2023

We've talked a lot about committing fully to relationships and overcoming our conflicts together, through examining the subconscious wounds that actually underly our relational upsets.

But here's my question: Is that realistic?

Today, we talk about getting clearer on the contents of our potential and current relationship partners' preprogramming, through checking our own somatic experiences, our shared trauma histories, and their adaptions to the social systems that raised them.

For alllll the relationship x CPTSD details that will reframe how you view other people and yourself... hit and join the private conversation around relearning "healthy relating."

Prepare to reflect.



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